Sunday, June 15, 2014

Daily Struggles With and Things You Need to Know About Jehovah's Witnesses

These are incidents described by various individual Ex-Jehovah's Witnesses and non-Jehovah's Witnesses, regarding the behaviors of Jehovah's Witnesses, with whom they come in contact.  We'll be adding many more. 

Posted by Brian K. on 10/04/2014:
Today my brother, who is an elder, threatened me with a committee meeting.  He told me that the Candace Conti's story was a lie and that she was never a Jehovah's Witness.  He told me that all of the Ex- Jehovah's Witnesses are mean and bitter, and he also told me that he would keep his children from being around me.  I guess his wife went on my Facebook page and found out that I was on the "monster of the flying spaghetti and meatball" web page (GASP!)  I knew it was going to happen sooner or later.  My much older brother went behind my back and told my brother who is an elder about our conversation that we had two nights ago, and that is how this whole thing started tonight.  So I'm not too worried about anything.  I have my freedom.  I do have family who does support me and they love me very much and so life goes on.  I'm kind of glad it is over and done with.  But my brother did ask me if I wanted the elders to contact me and I said, "No."  I did tell him that if they do start to cause trouble with me, I will get an attorney, and I told him that it is all bunch of crap!
Posted by Tracy Metcalfe on 9/25/2014:   I remember when someone asked me if I could talk to the elders on his behalf. He had been falsely accused of something (imagine that), and I was with him, which in turn could verify his innocence. The lead elder told him that I was not a credible witness, and therefore, they wouldn't listen to me. When I found out, I called the elder up. I asked him why he said I was not credible, and he told me that I was never at the meetings or out in service. So I said, "What if I told you that I was coming to your place to kick your ass? Would you believe me?" Before he could answer, I got in my car and drove to his house. He wouldn't come outside as I continued pounding on his door. "Get out here. I want to establish my credibility. " Needless to say, he apologized. 
Posted by Darlene Enriquez on 09/21/2014: Here's a story one of our friends told about their daughter.  It was discovered that her father had been molesting her and this had been going on for years.  Their family was at my sister's house and the police were called.  The police came and the man who is a Jehovah's Witness admitted to the police that it was true.  He was arrested.  An elder, highly respected by our family also came to the house and proceeded to tell my sister, "Why did you call the police?  You should not have done that, because it brings reproach on Jehovah's name."  When I learned what the elder had said, it really put the stake in the coffin for me.  This was about 12 years ago.  Throughout the trial, the Jehovah's Witnesses would come and sit on the father's side of the courtroom, while his daughters were ignored, with no one to support them.  This also included the mother, who was by her husband's side and abandoning their daughters.  The mother told lies and said that their daughters were lying.  Mind you, their mother knew about this, when it was happening.  He get did get 27 years, so hopefully he'll rot in prison.

Posted by George Miller on 09/20/2014:
This morning I tried to share a video in a private message to one of my daughters, only to find that she has blocked me like she had already done the rest of her family.  My last private messages to her were ignored by her, although they were only positive messages.  Things such as, "We love you -Mom and Dad."
That video I was wanting to share with my daughter was of one of my other daughters' singing, which brought tears to my eyes, but so did my other daughter blocking me.  By the way, for anyone interested, our entire family, including the daughter that blocked me, are Jehovah's Witnesses in good standing. (John 13:34~35)

Published on Jul 25, 2014
Brenda Lee, former Jehovah's Witness and author of "Out of the Cocoon," shares an intimate look of her life after being shunned by her family for over 34 years. This video is dedicated to her mother in remembrance of Watchtower Victims Memorial Day, July 26,2014.
 "Should I Study With Jehovah's Witnesses?  They Seem Like Very Nice People."

"The Zero They Forgot" by David Griebel.  
These are letters David, a former Jehovah's Witness, has written to the Watchtower Society Headquarters in New York City and to family members, which have all been IGNORED by every one of them!

Rick Fearon, RE: Watchtower Victims Memorial Day:
"The Police were watching as the Witnesses were being exposed for all their cover ups in front of the Mullins Center in Amherst, MA. The Elders were upset at our presence at their Regional Convention and were asking witnesses to go inside the arena. Ten minutes before the convention was over seven Elders came out and blocked the sidewalk so the Witlessness could not walk by us."

Response to ^^ Posted by Catherine Walters: 
What are the chicken elders afraid the rank and file Witnesses may hear or see, that they have to 'protect' them from, like bodyguard heavies.  That is the question.  Surely, if one's faith in a religion is rock-solid, NOTHING you hear or see will shake you from that belief.  Therefore my conclusion is, that the Governing Body of the Watchtower has given instructions to all elders to do this tactic, so nobody questions them and their shitty child protection policies backed by their two-witness rule that has led to so many children being molested and raped and not reporting it to civil authorities.  This alone would cause many Witnesses to doubt that God leads this organization.  If they leave, their donations and book-selling funds dwindle.  This 'religion' is all about money and gives not one fig about their members!  The cruel practice of shunning ex-members breaks up society's core which is the family unit.  This is unScriptural, unGodly and unloving.
I urge members of the public not to be rude to the Witnesses that approach you as they need a lot of love which they will never get unconditionally as JWs, but please do not buy their literature, give them donations or support them and their twisted doctrines in any way.   

Oh and two more things: never leave your children alone with one, male OR female and for God's sake, if you suspect a Witness child is being abused, report it to Child Welfare or the police. Nobody else will.

Posted by GĂ©rard Erdue:
I was talking to my non-Jehovah's Witness sister yesterday. She told me that my Jehovah's Witness (JW) sister, who lives in the same city that I was going to, is planning a family reunion with me and told her that she can come and visit me on her own.
I was livid!!!  Especially when she told me that my JW sister saw me out one day and wanted to talk to me, but didn't and felt bad because it hurts not to talk to me. She said that my other JW siblings feel the same.
I said, "That's Stupid!!!".
It's like hitting your head with a hammer continuously, yet crying, "It hurts!".
Disfellowshipping is not loving and shunning only brings weak-minded people of like "minds" together, when they're reinstated, so they can feel good when they do the same.

Posted by Marc Latham and Kerri Desmarais: 
We have just been reminded on another site here in the United Kingdom of the instructions we used to get in the Theocratic Ministry School, regarding the taking of notes on each household we visited in our door-to-door ministry.  Remember that ?

We were instructed to walk clear from the door sometimes around a corner (out of sight of the householders), before writing down every single piece of information on the unsuspecting householder.  Can you imagine if the householder knew that when the door was opened while one Jehovah's Witness was talking, the other would be casing their home?  We had to make notes about their cats, dogs, pictures on the wall, shrubs in the garden, how many children they had, what ages their children were (that right there is creepy as hell), what we talked about, what we placed with them, the problems they were having, etc.  

It was all supposed to "remind us" for when we came back for a return visit, but what if someone else got hold of our notes?! What if it got left behind and then all of a sudden, some criminal knows that Jane Doe is a single mother who stays at home with her 2 year old and newborn and has no family around, etc.?  

The pedophiles, who are protected by the Watchtower Society and hide in open spaces have the perfect excuse to talk to children while they are on the so called ministry.  That's the scary thing. They look like everyone else and they do a really good job of blending in.  It's really no wonder that the Watchtower Society has been called a Pedophile's Paradise!  They get all the protection they need AND access.  No society, if they knew the extent to which these predators can freely get to their children, would accept this as normal and okay.

This is basically intelligence gathering behind the backs of the householder. The fact we were trained to hide our notes as we recorded them should have suggested to us that something was very wrong here but like good "sheep" we just obeyed.

Can you imagine the repercussions, if society as a whole knew the extent to which Jehovah's Witnesses were trained to monitor every detail and then record it? Then if you add to that the possibility that one of those calling at the unsuspecting door was a pedophile ????  Then, just to put the "icing on the cake," try to imagine asking the householder this question: "Knowing all this, do you believe the Watchtower Society of Jehovah's Witnesses should be a registered charity???" Quite incredible when you really think about it.

Look at the potential here for an absolute disaster if that information gets into the wrong hands.  In some cases, it is already in the wrong hands, because some of these people in suits are pedophiles.  Headquarters for the Watchtower Society in New York (Bethel) has twenty-four thousand of them registered on their pedophile list and we know that most of these are walking door to door!!!

Posted by Sarah Shetler:
Recently I phoned my mother, after not having contact with her since December.  Our last conversation ended badly, with her comment that if I no longer worshiped Jehovah, she could not speak to me.  This I understood, although do not agree with, but it IS the Jehovah's Witness way.

My parents are moving 4 states away soon, and my children would like to see them one last time before that happens.  My children are five and seven years old.  Until a year ago, they had a good relationship with their grandparents.

When I posed this request to my mom, she said that she did not want to see the children anymore, and that it was my fault because I left the Watchtower Society.  She said that she is finished with me, and with the children, and to tell them whatever l wanted.  She no longer cared.

Admittedly, I was beyond incensed at her lack of love for her own family, and this is at the insistence of the men who run the Jehovah's Witness organization.  The thing is, my mother does not even live the Jehovah's Witness lifestyle.  She is what is called "inactive," doesn't attend meetings often, knock on doors, or attend the conventions, and hasn't done so for years.  She claims that she doesn't have to do those things to be a Jehovah's Witness.  All of you Ex-Jehovah's Witnesses know what a lie THAT is!

I guess my anger lies in the fact that she doesn't live like a Jehovah's Witness, following the strict lifestyle required, but she WILL follow the disgusting practice of shunning me for leaving the religion.  The worst of it is that she has disowned her grandchildren, innocent children who cannot fathom what they have done wrong to no longer want to be seen by the grandparents they love.

We will move on with our lives, without my parents, but there is a pain so deep that lives in my soul. I am writing about this experience, not for sympathy or for pity, but to let as many people as possible know the damage this religion causes to families. This is not an exaggeration of the situation or a hateful rant from a "mentally diseased" apostate.  It is a plea to anyone out there that may be thinking of joining the Jehovah's Witness faith, or even people who accept their literature.  THIS RELIGION is DESTROYING FAMILIES IN THE NAME OF GOD.  They shun their members in order to control and keep them IN the cult.

Please, believe me, the organization is quite successful in keeping people from leaving, because no one wants to lose their family and friends.

Posted by Nanette Masi, re: The Story of Jenny Walker and her Nan:
The same thing happened to my Grand Aunt, but I was too late to save her.  You must understand that your Grandmother is in grave danger.  

After my dear Aunt signed over power of attorney, healthcare surrogate, and executor of her will to the Watchtower Society, she was drugged, starved, and forced into hospice.  She was dead in four days.  I lived in Massachusetts and she was in Florida, so I only saw her once a year.  We spoke on the phone weekly, though, until her hearing aid was broken and we weren't able to talk directly for months.  

When I was told she had "taken a turn for the worse," I rushed down to see her.  My Aunt was actually conscious when I got there.  She told me she was glad she hadn't killed herself or she wouldn't have gotten to see me!  She said she had been in such excruciating pain that she wanted to commit suicide even though she knew it was a sin.  I found out later she had open bed sores that cause terrible pain.  She told me they had told her she was paralyzed from the waist down but wiggled her toes for me.  She also said that she thought they had broken her hearing aid on purpose.  Before she could say anything else, they gave her something that put her into a coma and I never got to speak to her again. An aide told me that she thought my Aunt had been given an overdose "by mistake," a few weeks earlier.  

When I called 9-1-1, they unplugged the phone.  When the police came, it turned out that they had made another call 9-1-1 right after mine, telling the operator that a grand niece was causing problems.  When the police came, the Jehovah's Witnesses claimed that I had assaulted them and the police said that if I didn't leave, they would put me in jail.  As you can imagine, it was a terrible nightmare.  

I'm up now at 4am because I read your story earlier and didnt have time to write. I woke up and couldnt sleep until I wrote you.  It turns out that the Jehovah's Witnesses were claiming to the police that they were family members.  My Aunt was dead in less than 48 hours and she was immediately cremated to hide all evidence of abuse. Does the Jehovah's Witness lady call your nan "grandma" or "nan"?  They called my aunt "grandma" and my aunt was childless.  

Find out if your nan now has a joint bank account with the Jehovah's Witness lady.  I had no idea that they were stealing literally hundreds of thousands of dollars from my Aunt, not to mention they had her change her will.   I didn't even know my Aunt had that much money!  I never ever asked my aunt about her money, because I wanted her to know that I loved her, not her money.   I figured she could do whatever she wanted with her money. I know now that that was a terrible disservice to her, leaving her vulnerable to these predators, who were only after her money.  That is something I will always regret. 

If anyone has an elderly relative living on her own, you MUST review their finances and insure that they are not being victimized.  If I knew then what I know now about the Jehovah's Witnesses, I would have intervened a lot sooner!  Jenny, since you are close to your nan, remind her of her love for you, special times you've spent together, and open her eyes to the facts about Jehovah's Witnesses.  

My aunt loved to help people in need, giving children money, so that they could go to college. I think if she had known that Jehovah's Witnesses discourage children from going to college, being part of sports and art, she would never have gone further with them.  Jenny, please find a lawyer who is experienced with "undue influence" and elder affairs and definitely contact an elder abuse organization before it is too late. 

It's too late for my aunt, but I'm trying to tell her story to save others and put these people in prison!

Posted by Marilyn White:
Yesterday was Fathers Day, a very hard day for me to celebrate.  I lost my father to the cult many years ago, but I always held out hope that we'd reconnect somewhere down the line.  He's been dead for 6 years now and I still miss him.  A girl needs her father, no matter how strong she is.  I took a gift and a card to my Uncle Bob yesterday, since he's so good to me and has helped me through this difficult process, more than he will ever realize.
I woke up today dreaming of my father singing "I Did It My Way" by Elvis Presley.  My heart feels so heavy today because I miss him so much.  I've missed him for over 20 years (the years he shunned me).  I thought this would get easier as time went on but because there was no closure.  I am forever heartbroken.  No one should feel this pain because of an organization that destroys families.
I miss you Daddy! RIP James Anez.

Posted by Ruben Ortiz - No struggle at all...
Most of the people that I have met through Ex-Jehovah's Witness Recovery Group 3! and other meetups are some of the most amazing people I have ever met.  There was so much brilliance dimmed by the tactics and fear imparted by the Watchtower Society.  Now that they are free, these people shine like bright stars, illuminating us with their excellence.  There are many more in there waiting to be freed.  For some it's a matter of time, for others it's a matter of circumstance, and for others it's a matter of hearing the right words.  However it happens, we'll be here to witness their transformation with a friendly hand extended, an open ear, and some encouraging words.  I am proud of what we've all been able to accomplish in the last decade or so.  It's been a real shift, and the internet has really made a huge exodus possible.  Can you imagine what's going to happen in the next few years with all these brilliant people free to think on their own?  Keep up the good work all, and keep evolving towards a better you, always.

Posted by Kenneth Noisewater:
I've never posted anything to this group.  Usually I feel positive about my de-conversion, but today I feel the need to rant a bit.
I left about eight years ago.  My parents did the usual shunning until I was married and had my first child.  Then they came around more, wanting to be involved with my family while trying to keep me at arms length.  I had another child and eventually, divorced.  My parents began making back door deals with my ex-wife to see the kids without having to see me, until she got fed up with their Jehovah's Witness bull and said to talk to me if they wanted to see our children.
This weekend, my two brothers (one never baptized and one who has been inactive for some time) came home for a visit and all wished to see my children, as well. So I drove up, spent time with my brothers and let my parents visit with the children.  I kept my words short and sweet with my parents and I didn't have a problem letting the children stay overnight with my family while I slept in the car.
Today, with temperatures in the 90's, I went into the house and sat quietly with my children, while I cooled off.  My mother motioned for me to follow her and led me outside.  She proceeded to let me know I had overstepped my bounds and was trying to become too comfortable.  Then came the sermon.

She began with, "You know, you had a lot of friends in God's organization."

I responded, 'I have a lot of friends now."

"Yes, but would they die for you?" She asked

"I'm in the Army.  Yes, they would die for me!"

She seemed shocked, then said, "That's another thing, pledging allegiance to country when it should be to Jehovah!"

I said, "The difference is my country is real."

"You don't believe in God?!"

"I don't believe in your twist on God, because God is Love and yours is a prick."

She said, "Jehovah is love."

"That may be what you preach, but not what you practice. You believe God is okay with you treating your son like a mangy dog, because his organization gave him a label."

She seemed somber at this, then said quietly, "If you'd only come back, we could be a family again..."

I said this quite sternly, "If a third party has to decide whether or not I can be your family, then I don't want it, because that isn't love, it's blackmail."

I walked away knowing I'd probably never speak to them ever again.  I gathered my children's things and left.

Posted by Melody Rhodes:
I miraculously found an actual contact email for Jehovah's Witnesses' Watchtower Society ( and wrote the following letter:

The other day, an elderly Jehovah’s Witness called at my home and upon learning that I had left the religion, became increasingly denigrating.  He refused to address points I raised and dismissed what I had said, saying “All of it is nonsense.”
For a group that says it champions freedom of religion and religious expression, it is obvious that the opposite is the reality.  The only “freedom of religion” the Society is in favor of is its own.
This gentleman later called me a witch.
Whether or not we agreed on theological viewpoints, I found his behavior highly inappropriate and disrespectful.  I did not treat him in this fashion.  When I asked him what his favourite Bible book was (as a way of diffusing the situation), he said he wasn’t going to tell me and asked suspiciously why I wanted to know.  I pointed out that he had come to my home uninvited and wanted to discuss the Bible, yet when I tried to steer our conversation into those channels, he was unwilling to do so.
Please put my home on your Do Not Call List.  I live ____.  I do not care for these one-sided exchanges, nor behavior that borders on being abusive.
Thank you,
Melody Rhodes (See Melody's blog at JW Borg )

Posted by Angel Laydee:
My husband, the father of my son and I were married through the Jehovah's Witness religion.  One day, my husband just became bipolar seemingly out of the blue.  I thought he was mad at me or something, so our son and I just kept our distance, and hoped he would get over his suddenly weird nature, strange thoughts, odd actions, and personality, that he had hence begun manifesting.  Well to make a long story short, Elders, who I knew came and helped me to get him to the nearest psychiatric center for admission.  I thanked those two "brothers," ("brothers," "sisters" is a Jehovah's Witness label), so much for helping in such a difficult situation!
After my husband's third admission to the mental hospital, I filed for divorce.  During the divorce proceedings, my four sisters, in DNA only, stood on his side.  I joke and say, (beneath my inner pain), he won them in the divorce, (he played and acted like he was one of them).  I was ostracized, of course, since they all considered me to be evil for not staying with a paranoid, delusional, schizophrenic, bipolar man in a manic phase, not to mention that our son was age ten and definitely in danger, as was I.
This man, in a psychotic state kept depositing his entire paycheck into the Kingdom Hall money box, week after week after week, and withdrew money out of our joint account, which was not even in there.  I wrote letters to and called the elders, though nothing was done about this.  I want to Thank all of them for not giving a damn about our family, our health and safety, and for taking advantage of a mentally ill man!!!

Posted by True Seeker:
While at the Amos Lee concert last night, we saw a group of our Jehovah's Witness friends, 'elders and wives' and were appropriately shunned, as expected.  After it got dark, one of our old friends found us, never spoke a word, gave each of us a big hug and hurried back through the crowd, so as not to be seen.  It makes me sad, not for me, but 'for him.'  I realized that I still love my Jehovah's Witness friends and I HATE, in the strongest sense, the Watchtower Society!

Posted by Pete Jones:
My current peeve is my ex-wife (still a Jehovah's Witness) is now cementing friendships will all my old Jehovah's Witness friends.
For example: Jim and Barb McReynolds from Trail and their two daughters.  My ex only met them once just after our marriage.  Jim studied with me and I was very close to them. They were part of the "Watchtower Society love bomb" that drew me in over 30 years ago.  My daughter tells me that she will be staying with them over the summer. What do they say when Nakita talks about her Dad?  She is perceptive.  She will see that they shun me and look all 'sad' whenever my name is mentioned.
More of the same with another couple. Connie and Sylvain.  My ex only talked to them once or twice during our 17 year marriage. Now they are all tight and spending the night at each others homes.
My ex-wife seems to revel in stabbing me with the "shunning sword" any way she can, even through my daughter.
What is bringing them together after all these years?  My disassociation has brought them together.  My ex has an audience that will listen to her stories of how I have been so cruel and wicked and how she is a victim.  She plays her part well, harvesting sympathy and praise for her steadfast stand.  My daughter is autistic and this feeds their "pity party" even more.
I'm very disappointed in people that claim to be true Christians, like those that I used to respect.  Listening to my daughter talk about these old 'friends' of mine, makes me want to continue to oppose this cult for the rest of my days.