When I was ten years old, I was watching a movie called "Earthquake 76," with my mother. She told me that earthquakes and death were going to happen at Armageddon and, if I was not baptized as a Jehovah's Witness, I would die. I ran outside and dropped to the ground, begging God not to destroy me. "I promise to be good!" I screamed. I thought of that incident for many terrified years and was baptized at the young, fragile age of fourteen years.
I was very abused and turned to the elders, but I was shunned. They didn't help me. It was okay for my father to be a drunkard, and for my mother to beat me, sit on me, cut me and starve me. So, I ran away. I began smoking cigarettes and told the elders that I wanted no part of a so-called religion that did not care about me.
I moved back home after running away, because my parents were moving to Alaska. My younger brothers and sisters were moving with them and I did not want to be without my siblings. We were in Alaska for two weeks, when my Jehovah's Witness mother took a gun to my head and told me to "get out" or she was going to "blow my head off."
Many years passed.....I was alone. I actually tried going back to the meetings at the Kingdom Hall to make sure I wasn't missing anything. I had all 4 of my children by then. When I walked into the Kingdom Hall, I sat down and an elder announced to the congregation that I was disfellowshipped, and the entire hall turned and looked at me as if I were Satan. I continued trying to fit in for three months. I had questions and no one could answer me until I was reinstated. My reinstatement never happened.
I am a believer in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. It's been a hard road, but I learned to lay everything on His shoulders, as I walk with Him. I thank God for loving me. I miss my parents everyday, but the only thing I can do is pray that God opens their hearts, so they can see that I am okay and I am not a horrible person. If I have one thing to say about the Jehovah's Witnesses. I don't believe we can judge them. I believe that they really think they are doing what God wants them to do, but let us not judge, let us pray for them.